We are constantly being told we need to ‘aim high in life’, ‘to reach for the stars’, to ‘build big goals’ – and I absolutely, whole heartedly agree.
It’s what I teach my clients and, in my experience, having a BIG goal is the single biggest difference between people who achieve any level of success in life, and those who don’t.
However, there is an innate part of being a human that means we want to be accepted by others. We want to be liked.
We don’t want to be ridiculed, criticised or looked down upon by our family, friends or peers and it’s this fear that can drive these feelings of foolishness and naivety.
And one of the biggest, quickest, guaranteed killers of dreams (BIG goals) is fear of what other people will think.
The honest truth is, there is a very good chance that if, when you’ve decided on your C-Type goal (and if you haven’t, you really need to join my next FREE 5-Day Science Of Success Challenge!), you start telling the people around you what it is, you’re not going to get the positive response you’re looking for.
The first question you’re likely to hear, if you do tell them about this new, worthy goal you’re working towards is ‘how do you plan to do that?’
And if you don’t yet know how you’re going to do it, the doubts start to kick in.
What you must understand is that the people who ask that question, the ones who will try to force their negative energy onto you by trying to make you justify or explain your goals, are the ones who will never achieve fulfilment in their own lives.
They may be acting out of jealousy, guilt or a genuine fear for your wellbeing in some way, usually driven by their own fears.
Are these the people you really want to be taking advice from?
Those who are truly successful themselves and are on the path to achieving their own goals do not behave in this way.
My advice is 3-fold:
- Don’t tell them. No-one needs to know what your C-Type goal is. It’s your goal. The people, help, ideas and resources you need will start to come as you focus internally on achieving it and start to put your own action steps in place to work towards it. There is absolutely no need to tell anyone who is not already on their own path to a C-Type Goal.
- Surround yourself with positive, uplifting people. Those who are, themselves, immersed in personal growth work will support and encourage you. Start to distance yourself from negative people who complain about their own circumstances but will do nothing to improve them.
- Work on your own personal growth and self-image so that you are able to completely disregard any criticism or negative comments without internalising them. Allowing other people and outside circumstances to dictate how you feel will affect the actions you take and the results you get.
One of the greatest, most valuable attributes of a truly successful person is the ability to make one’s own decisions, based on what you really want, and stick to them – without having to ask everyone and his dog for their opinion.
Perfecting the art of decision making and learning to control your emotions will lead to a quantum leap in getting the results you really want and is the secret to actually achieving those big life goals.
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